What does it mean: TO FORGIVE (part 1)
The people we have in our lives (the ones closest to us) are mostly there because of divine connections. God has a way of bringing us together with them, and them with us. To help us to grow, to sharpen us and to challenge us; Therefore they aid in our development and growth. Not just spiritual growth, but emotional and relational growth. Because of the many levels of relationships we have there is always a time when we will have to choose to forgive; over holding on to anger or bitterness or UN-forgiveness. UN-forgiveness only hurts the one UN-willing to forgive.
This definition was given to me from the Holy Spirit on this subject. It came about because I was studying this very topic out for myself. I had some things happen in my life and was having trouble understanding exactly how to go about forgiving. I mean, what does it really mean to forgive.
What does it “feel like”?
To forgive someone is actually not a feeling we go through; it is a choice we make TO FORGIVE. There are ranges of emotions we go through during the forgiveness process; But, the ACT of forgiving ~ only takes a second.
After we choose to forgive ~ There will be thoughts and reminders of course, (brought about from the devil) to try to get us to go back to UNFORGIVING them. This is because we were reminded of how we felt during their “crimes against us”. These are the feelings and the emotions that The Holy Spirit was talking to me about. He explained the process that occurs.
Dealing with negative thoughts
It’s important how we choose to deal with those emotions when they arise, and how we respond is what determines our freedom from offense and our truly forgiving someone.
To sit and dwell on the offense, means that we are focused on and meditating on the offense itself; including the emotions associated with and involving the people who offended us.
2Co 10:5 KJV Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;
Php 4:8 KJV Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.
Negative emotions cause a whole range of physical changes to occur…increase in blood pressure…increase in heart rate…emotional disorders… ulcers and etc. The list goes on…This is a direct result from our still holding on to the emotions and intense feelings we’re harboring surrounding people, past memory(s) and/or event(s).
Forgiving someone takes a conscious and deliberate effort on our part
- It takes us being willing to capture those thoughts and casting them down… Recognize them for what they are…thoughts from the enemy to keep us bound in unforgiveness and bitterness.
- As soon as the thought(s) come you have to rebuke the thought and then IMMEDIATELY begin praying for that person; and every time the thoughts arise.
- Told God I forgave them and released them from all wrong.
- Began to ask God to bless them and increase them.
- Prayed for their protection and safety.
- Asked God to increase them in their financial situation.
- Believed God to bring them more revelation into spiritual matters.
- Heal them in their emotional condition and in their body.
- Make them whole, healed and delivered in their spirit, soul and body.
It doesn’t always feel easy and we sometimes wonder why its such “hard work”. Especially, when you find yourself doing this same process 50 times in a day; but the results are AMAZING and FREEING ~ It truly does work.
You will know when this happens.
When the thoughts come and you’re reminded of the person and the situation and your emotions are not affected nor involved in the memory or memories!!!
Let me explain it…
I was shedding many tears of hurt and deep emotional turmoil and the cries were intense; but I was not praying to God about the wrong done to me and how bad they had hurt me….I was praying instead; for them to be blessed, increased, promoted etc.; however, as I’m praying FOR them; I was releasing all the pain and anguish and resentment and bitterness unto the Lord.
To this day, I have vague memories of what happened and I remember my prayers instead of; the hurts associated with the situation. You see, I don’t have any emotional ties to the situation. My memory is separate from the emotions; because there are not negative emotions associated with that memory!!!
That is FREEDOM in FORGIVENESS. This is what it means TO FORGIVE!!! Much Love and Prayers Carol Helmick